Modest No More

Less is not always more. Especially when it comes to clothing on a Friday night. More and more college women are wearing next to nothing in an effort to stand out and “look hott.” Instead of rejecting the sex-symbol stereotypes about women in the media and pop culture, young women are reinforcing them.

Why do college women feel compelled to party every weekend (and even some weeknights) in clothes that disrespect their bodies and minds? This perpetuates an unbecoming value system. The media have created an idealized role, and young women are embracing it. The trend toward skimpy outfits affects all women, even those who are not participating in it. They are being forced by retailers and their peers to choose from limited clothing options. In this progressive age, we have supposedly empowered girls by offering them anything they want. But in reality, “it’s a world designed by media and marketing executives that targets children as consumers, channels girls’ desires, and entices them into predictable types” (Lamb, Sharon & Brown, p. 9).

The mold we provide for young women is a distorted one. We give them a false choice: They can try to get attention from men by wearing something provocative and inviting, or they can hold on to their dignity and go unnoticed.  Those who choose to dress and act with self-respect are ostracized. 

Looking sexy is not as simple as retailers would have us believe.  On most women, the typical clubbing dress – which, depending on the person, could also pass for a blouse – looks unsophisticated and trashy. I would count the number of scantily clad drunk and sober women I see, but they all seem to blend together. If the goal is to be noticed, then why have all these party outfits become the same: lascivious and tasteless? They blur the line between sexy and slutty. Can’t a woman be attractive without showing inappropriate amounts of skin? Without a doubt.  But campus cultural norms discourage us from exploring more interesting and modest options. The current wardrobe mentality is not progressive but restrictive

America is a free country, and every person has the right to wear pretty much whatever he or she wants. College is a time for experimentation and free expression, but those things can be achieved without sacrificing self-respect.

When you play into a stereotype, you are affecting others. What to wear is more than a personal decision. It creates a mindset, an unspoken competition, between college girls to outdo one another. The subtraction of fabric from an outfit seems to add a bit of confidence to the girl who wears it.  But from this female’s perspective, revealing clothes are a sign of insecurity and desperation. Why do women feel they have to do these things to win approval from the opposite sex?  Aren’t we just empowering men to discriminate, discount, and disrespect us?

Catcalls in a girl’s direction may impart a sense of satisfaction and pride. But that feeling doesn’t last.  When it fades, all that’s left is a desperate desire for more. This kind of attention can easily get out of hand. I am not saying that victims of sexual assault are at fault. No way. However, a study conducted by Burkhart and Stanton in 1988 showed that “…victims [of sexual assault] tend to be female, have low self-esteem, follow the traditional feminine sex roles, have had previous encounters involving sexual coercion or sexual assault, and have a high status within their peer groups” (Ottens & Hotelling, p. 122). This discovery is truly frightening.

Greek life is a hotbed of parties and social functions fueled by sex, drugs, and alcohol. Too many intentional “wardrobe malfunctions” occur in those settings. When young women who attend Greek parties are described as sorostitutes, something is seriously wrong. When did looking like a prostitute become attractive or even acceptable? Women are voluntarily broadcasting their desperation. If a woman does not intend to hook up with someone – if she is just wanting to look cute and have fun – then her appearance is sending the wrong message.  She is announcing to the world that she doesn’t respect herself. And if she doesn’t respect herself, how can she expect others to respect her and take her seriously?

Appearance says a lot about our values, morals and preferences. Apparel is a quick and easy way to categorize a person.  Our conscious and unconscious fashion decisions say more about us than we fathom. It is unfortunate, but true. We ought to be more intentional about the images we project. Society has already objectified young women; why should we carry it even further? Although it may boost our self-esteem to be noticed by the opposite sex, other things are important too. Dignity, for example.

Here is a modest proposal. Perhaps we can gain respect, positive attention, and confidence in a more dignified manner.  Perhaps we can take the initiative to break out of the stereotypical and narrow wardrobe choices being offered to young women today.

Lamb, Sharon, and Brown (2007) Packaging Girlhood Rescuing Our Daughters from Marketers’ Schemes. Boston: St. Martin’s Griffin.

Ottens and Hotelling (2001) Sexual violence on campus policies, programs, and perspectives. New York: Springer.